Senior DNN Entertainment Analyst, G.Mansion, reports from the shores of Santa Monica, where he spent time undercover as a local hobo during the DomainFest Global event held at the end of January. He reported the following and then disappeared into the Canadian Rockies.

10. “The man is human Restasis, his mere presence makes my eyes water.”

9. “Feel like I’m in a giant urinal” ~ at the Getty Center

8. “That’s the second time I’ve seen Triple G in a black thong.”

7. “Spike your hair any higher and you’ll be on Jersey Shore.”

6. “TheBestPrice.com is up for auction…for eighteen million” (insert irony/wisecrack here)

5. “First time I’ve ever seen anyone win a domain name for one dollar.”

4. “Trust me, you can’t smoke in here.” ~ The Penthouse, right before two guards tossed him out and one snuffed the heater on his hand.

3. “iThink the iPad iSucks.”

2. “No, he’s not a magician, he’s just happy to see you.”

1. “Would you like to make sweet love, Monkey Lady?”  ~ At the Mansion, by the monkey cage.